Feel
by hghrules
Summary: *kktato, skylox, setosolace, and dozens more XD* Welcome to Feel! Ironically, it is about a world that cannot Feel. Shh. Minor details.
1. Welcome to the World of Feel!

Welcome to _Feel!_

Ironically, it is about **a world that can _not_ Feel.**

Shh. Minor details.

The main character, A.K.A. **TYLER FRICKING CHRISTIE** , A.K.A. THE BE-AY-YOO-TIFUL MUNCHINGBROTATO, is one of few **who _can_ Feel,** so, hey, the title _is_ justified! Tyler lives in a time **After the Release** (which was a horrible time where demons were cast out of Hell - the demons dissolved into the OverWorld air and the chemicals that made them jacked up the humans. Nice going, Herobrine). And he'd give absolutely anything to have lived **_Before_ the Release,** instead.

Unfortunately, he's stuck in present time (187 A.R. or something), and he's dreading waking up every morning to go to a school full of unfeeling people in a town full of unfeeling people in a freaking _world_ full of unfeeling people. But then **the government has a minor freak-out over the rising up of a small organization called the "Before Council** ," which strives to return the world to how it was Before the Release, and Tyler gets caught in the middle of it, and you know what?

Maybe he doesn't mind all that much.

* * *

Anyways, guys, I'm so excited to finally be writing this! I'm doing it for NanoWrimo, so I'll be posting a chapter every day, if possible. Heh, _if possible._

There _will_ be Kktato, as well as Skylox, Setosolace, maybe Merome and Ssunkipz depending on which characters I use the most and in which parts of the story. Any other ships related to TC or Tyler or Kyle that you guys would like to see?

Uh, I haven't got much else to say. Any ideas, you can put in the comments, though I've already plotted out the majority of the story with the be-ay-yoo-tiful TheWalkingYouTubers (on Wattpad). Thanks, friend. :) You have been and still are a major help.

UHHHHH

IS THAT ALL?

YUP

THAT'S ALL

MKAI

BAIII, MY BE-AY-YOO-TIFUL RULERS! I'LL HAVE THE FIRST CHAPTER UP TOMORROW!


	2. 1: Feelings

_TA-DA. Short chapter, but only cuz it's the prologue. I will catch up to the proper word count per day with the normal chapters. En-juh-hoy, my be-ay-yoo-tiful Rulers! Also, if any of you want to be a writing buddy of mine and vice versa for Nanowrimo, friend me on the site. ^.^_

 **Feel**

 **Chapter One: Feelings**

 **Approximate Reading Time: Three Minutes**

I've only been hugged once.

It hurts and I hate it because, what the crap, no one else hurts like this! No one else has to deal with this ridiculousness. Who even invented Feelings in the first place? Some idiot from before Before, probably. Ugh. Curse them.

It was my mother, by the way. She hugged me. Right before she left. I can't remember the date, when it was that she left, and I'll admit I feel horrible for that. I at least know that it was sometime between September and December of 143 A.R., but that doesn't exactly help much. Not that I particularly _want_ to remember that day's specific date. That would make it hurt even more.

She left me in charge of our library, the one that takes up the entirety of our large basement. It's where we keep the Before books and movies and CDs and it's my favorite place in the entire world, mostly because I don't feel quite so different down there.

Ha, that alone is part of what sets me apart, that horrible feeling of "I'm different." Because even if they were different in some way, they wouldn't _feel_ different, they wouldn't _feel_ bad or left out because of it. They wouldn't _feel_ anything.

Doesn't matter. The people Before were able to Feel, and they wrote tons of books chock full of that feeling. Love stories, tales of trust and betrayal, ideas and emotion woven into novels and poems and screenplays and music and all sorts of other things of which there are too many to list within a reasonable amount of time. Because of this, I'm surrounded by all that familiar feeling the moment I enter the library, and it's strengthening, enlightening... it's relieving.

In an earlier time, I would have been normal.

Of course, I won't deny that there are obvious perks to being different, to being something the After Council just can't quite predict. No taxes, don't have to pay for- well, anything, really. Anything to keep me from raising some terrible Feeling rebellion.

Come on, guys. Me and what army? Oh, perhaps the emotionless Blanks will help me. Yes, surely they are simply dying to assist me in the overthrowing of their own lovely nation.

Mm, as if.

The person on the television cries out something about bear hybrids, and I raise an eyebrow. This show is crazy, half in a good way and half in a 'what-the-crap' way. The season I'm watching is actually the last one that was ever released, though- I think it was shut down for some reason after the last episode. Some of the contestants jacked up the set, or something; I'm not entirely sure. I suppose I'll find out when I reach the end.

I love all the Before shows, but I particularly love the kind like this, where such raw emotion is poured out and the actors or contestants or just _people_ don't even realize it's happening. For them, it's normal - it's just a thing that occurs. I wish I could live in their time, be normal with them. I wouldn't mind getting my heart broken or almost dying or _anything_ , really, just so long as I could spit out that much emotion and not be ridiculed for it.

Ah, but I can't. I'm different, after all. I live in the here and now, despite my consistent complaints about it. I do not possess the ability to go back in time.

I do, however, possess the ability to suck it up and move on with life, hoping against all hopes that the next day will be better. It has to be better, right? Can't be any worse.

Someday, I will learn to stop saying that.


	3. 2: Science and Strangers and Labs, Oh My

**Feel**

 **Chapter Two: Science and Strangers and Labs, Oh My!**

 **Approximate Reading Time: Six Minutes**

"Hey, the freak is doing the thing again!" Taylor points out with fake excitement woven into his voice, and I wince as I duck my head. Must they point it out every single time?

"Oh, he _is_! Look at that, how does he _do_ that?" asks Jordan. I sigh, willing the blush to go away.

"Does it happen _every_ time he says something stupid, or only some of the times?" Ashley wonders aloud. Why does the universe hate me?

"Now, Class," the teacher interrupts, and I thank the Heavens for giving me a sane adult. "One must be polite when turning a classmate into a science experiment. Tyler, would you mind explaining to us the reasoning behind your chameleon powers?"

"Oh, oh my _dear_ Notch - I don't have any _chameleon powers!_ I blush when I'm embarrassed, okay? It's just the blood rushing to my face, get over it," I huff, regretfully feeling my face heat up even more.

"Well. _Someone_ sure is snappy today," Tiffany snorts.

"Maybe he needs those anger management classes we read about in that Before book," Annie suggests, and I throw my hands up.

"What the crap, I'm not even angry!"

"He ain't even mad," Jack whispers to Mark, forcing a giggle, and I drag my hand down my face in exasperation.

"Why must you always be so _annoying_?"

"Tyler!" our teacher rebukes. Her terrible attempt at looking offended almost pains me. "That was horribly rude. I expected more from you."

"No, you didn't!" I shout, standing up and pushing my chair in. "Of course you didn't! I'm _Feeling,_ you expect me to fail regularly! Why can't you just-"

The bell rings, cutting my rant short, and I scowl at the entirety of the class before stomping out the door with my backpack slung over my shoulder. Why do I tolerate their crap!? It isn't fair, and they're all Blank idiots, and-

Oh, geez, what did I just do?

I _never_ react to them like that! Heck, I never have the _courage_ to react to them like that. They're terrifying, and their roles in my early childhood were, frankly, traumatizing. Plus, I'm shy to begin with. Me standing up to the Blanks? Not exactly something you see every day.

"Yo, Tyler, wait up!" shouts an empty voice that I'm sad to say I recognize. My non-Blank (but still Blank) student. "We heard the commotion in your class from all the way across the hall."

"That's great, Ryan."

"So, you gonna do it again tomorrow? It was totally awesome, but you're usually so quiet."

"No, definitely not. And, uh, yes, Ryan, I am."

"Right, because you're Feeling and we're all Blanks. None of us understand any of that emotion stuff."

"Thank you for that lovely observation, Captain Obvious."

"No problem, Sergeant Sarcasm." He giggles. "Did I do it right?"

I sigh, plastering a fake smile on my face and hoping this Blank won't be able to tell the difference. "Yeah, Ryan, perfect execution."

"Thanks!" He pretends to glow at the praise, a trick I taught him in an attempt to try not to feel so alone. It was dumb, thinking I could teach a Blank to Feel. "So, wanna come over to my house again? You can teach me more about Before!" He pauses, eyes widening. "Hey, that rhymed! Do I laugh, or just smile?"

"Either one. It depends on your personality."

"Which one should I do, then?"

"Hmm. Based on the personality you've built for yourself, I would expect you to do neither. You'd probably just ignore the rhyme and move on."

"Oh." He frowns, sensing that he's done something wrong and should act accordingly. "Okay. So, wanna come to mine?"

"No, thank you, Ryan. I need some time to binge-watch a couple Before shows or something."

"Ooh, can we binge-watch togethe-"

"No. See you tomorrow, Ryan."

He furrows his eyebrows in mock confusion as I start to turn away. "Should I act offended?"

"No. Just go home."

"Oh, okay!" he yells cheerfully. I let out a long breath and begin on the path through the woods. Life, I swear.

Luckily, my house is fairly secluded - and by 'fairly,' I mean 'absolutely.' It's smack dab in the middle of Hazelnut Forest, and the route that leads in and out of said forest is creepy and mildly dangerous. We're talking annoying, path-blocking foliage, inconveniently-placed raging rivers, and an unnecessarily _narrow_ path. Despite not being capable of emotions like fear, most of the Blanks avoid my forest. Whether it's because of some instinctual need to steer clear or because of a direct order from the Tyler-loving government that rules our nation, I don't really care. Just so long as I'm allowed to sit peacefully and uninterrupted in my lovely home, I'm fine.

"Ba dum, ba dum, ba dum ba dum ba dum, ba dadadada..." A sound, so quiet that it's nearly inaudible, so airy that it may be one with the wind, drifts through the forest.

"Um..." I raise an eyebrow and glance around at the trees.

"Ba dum! Ba dum..." Okay, probably not the wind at this point.

"Hello..?"

"Ba dadadada-"

"You are terrible at this," a new voice hisses, and I spin to face the direction it came from.

"Who's there?" I ask, trying not to get too nervous.

"What, no! I'm great at this, did you not see my ninja rolls!? Ba dadadada!"

"Notch, shut up! We're on a _mission._ " the second voice huffs.

"Mission, shmission!"

" _Sky,"_ the second voice groans. "This is important. Tyler's an Emotive."

"No dip, Sherlock."

"Screw you, Watson."

"That was honestly really good," the first voice giggles, and I growl.

"Who are you?" I ask. A couple of Blanks from school? Nah, they wouldn't venture into the forest for a prank. A couple of Blank adults, then? But why would they be bothering me? "Either show yourself or leave."

"He's a snappy one."

"Could you please take this seriously, Sky?" asks the second voice.

"Pssh. Seriousness. The excuse of horribly bland people."

"Am I horribly bland, then?"

"No! No, of course not, you're awesome, you're-"

"I don't care _what_ you guys are, I care _who_ you are!" I tell them, fighting the urge to stomp my foot like a Feeling child.

"Ah, right. Sorry, Tyler," the second voice replies, and a boy my age steps out of the darkness of the forest.

"I'm Ty, nice to meet you."

"And I'm SkythekiDRSBUTYOUCANCALLMESKY, OH, NOTCH-" The owner of the first voice - Sky - falls out of a tree, flailing his arms, and Ty sighs in exasperation.

"Sorry. Again. We're here because you're an Emotive," Ty explains, blatantly ignoring Sky's troubles.

"Emotive?" I ask, doing my best to ignore him as well.

"Yeah, as in feeling emotions..?" Ty's voice goes up at the end of his sentence, and I wonder if he thinks he's got the wrong person. Maybe he does.

"Oh! Yeah, I'm Feeling. Why does it matter?" I'm hovering between extremely curious and mildly concerned.

"We're supposed to bring you back to the lab so the scientists can take a look at you." Ahem, scratch that, mildly curious and extremely concerned.

"Haha, cool! Let me just, um, maybe I should go empty my backpack first..." I trail off before whipping around and sprinting down the path toward my house.

Two strangers kidnapping me to take me to a _laboratory_? Haha, no, not today, Universe.

"Tyler, wait! We're trying to help-"

"Ty!" Sky screeches, and I falter, the part of me dominated by Feelings urging me to go back and make sure they aren't hurt. But then I remember the whole scientists and laboratories bit of the conversation and decide they're probably fine. "Oh, Notch- are you all right? _Ty!_ "

I force myself forward, through the dangerous vegetation of Hazelnut Forest and towards the front door of my house.


	4. 3: Sir Batman Dinnerbone Squarepants

_THE STRESS IS REAL OMG_

 _THANKS FOR ALL YOUR COMMENTS, BTW 3_

 **Feel**

 **Chapter Three: Sir Batman Dinnerbone Squarepants**

 **Approximate Reading Time: Six Minutes, Forty-Five Seconds**

Five minutes. Five minutes. Five minutes.

 _Just five more minutes._

"And who was the neighbor of the cat of the daughter of the second cousin of the founder of the After Council?" asks our teacher, and I slouch down even farther in my seat. Don't pick me, don't pick me, just don't pick me for _five more minutes-_ "Tyler?"

It's harder for me than it is for the other students, this whole learning thing. I think, if I had lived before, I would have been considered fairly smart. But in the here and now, where the majority of children have no problem staying focused, steering clear of any distraction, and avoiding the nonexistent Feelings that certainly _aren't_ swimming around in their hearts and heads, it isn't enough to be naturally smart and study all the time. Not if you're Feeling, that is.

"Um... S-Sir Batman Dinnerbone Squarepants?" I guess, throwing out a collection of names from various Before things I've read or watched before.

"Correct!" She gives me the best Unfeeling smile she can muster, and I fake my own smile after realizing hers is just an impression of the pity smiles shown in common Before movies. "That's the first one you've gotten right all week, Tyler!"

"Ah, thank you," I mumble, looking down at my paper and going back to slouching. Please don't call on me again, oh dear-

"Can you tell us the name of the daughter and her cat?" Oh, oh my dear Notch, _why,_ world!?

"U-Uh, the daughter was named Emily, and the cat was named Patches." I cross my fingers beneath my desk.

"I'm sorry, Tyler, that's incorrect," she replies, frowning as if she, again, expected more from me. That was a dumb move on her part. Luckily for her, she can't feel true disappointment. "Jordan, do you have an answer?"

"You bet. The _cat's_ name was Emily, and the _daughter's_ name was Patches. Get rekt, Freak!" Jordan shouts near the end, laughing and looking over at me. I sigh and sink down lower so that my mouth is almost level with the surface of my desk.

"Good! All right, your homework for tonight is to finish the questions listed on pages 789 through 791. It shouldn't be too difficult. I expect it to be resting on my desk tomorrow morning at the sound of the bell. Have a good-"

The bell rings, cutting the teacher off and making my classmates cheer in mock relief. My relief, on the other hand, is silent and one hundred percent real as I dart out of the classroom and then out of the school.

I'm a bit uneasy about going home after what happened yesterday, but, luckily, Ryan was easy to persuade to go to a couple of shops with me after school. "I'll teach you how to walk into a store like the Before people did," I'd told him.

"But you taught me how to walk like them a year ago, when those other Blanks were trying to find you before school-"

"No, shh. You've clearly forgotten, so we're doing a touch-up lesson. And, anyways, that was how to walk into a _school_ , not a store."

He fell for it, as always.

"So, what do you think? Am I doing this right?" he asks now as we walk down the street towards a candy shop. It's always funny to hype the Blanks up on sugar and sweets.

"Oh, perfectly, Ryan," I reply, watching as he struts down the road with his hands on his hips and his feet kicking out sharply with each step. I taught him that a year ago for the sheer heck of it (and to keep him nearby for the entire length of my "lesson" so I could protect myself from some angry Blanks), and when he walked into school the next day and told everyone who'd taught him the walk, they were amazed. No one tried to beat me up or call me a freak for almost a week after that, but they had all wanted me to teach them how to walk like a Before person. They thought it would give their lives purpose or something. I didn't really care what they thought, just so long as they half-way respected me as long as they thought it.

The Blanks have conflicting emotions about my ability to Feel. Well, conflicting non-emotions. Hmph.

Conflicting thoughts and actions. Ah, there we go.

"Which shop has the most emotion, Tyler? Can you sense it? Can you _Feel_ it?" Ryan asks, trying to be excited as he glances from shop to shop.

"Oh, I certainly can, Ryan. Which one do _you_ think has the most emotion in it?" None of them. None of them have any emotion at all, but I'm willing to humor Ryan occasionally simply because he's the only Blank that puts up with me and that has never tried to hurt me. Well, besides... It doesn't matter. My old 'friend' ended up hurting me in the end anyway.

"The... The chocolate shop!"

"I dunno, the overall candy shop looks pretty good to me..."

"Darn it," Ryan mumbles, doing a pretty dang good job of faking disappointment.

"No, no, Ryan, you were right. It's the chocolate shop," I laugh, leading him towards it and imitating the odd walk I taught him.

Oh, I love this place. Chocolate everywhere. Nutella on every top shelf, dark chocolate scattered around by the milk and white chocolate, there are Oreos somewhere in the back and you can buy fudge near the front register. "Can I get those coconut chocolate things again?" Ryan asks. "They tasted good last time."

Sometimes I worry that he'll end up one of the Blanks who tries to eat their nonfeelings away. He's thin as a rail, though, so it's not really that pressing of a matter. "Do whatever you want, Ryan, it's your money."

He gives me his best pouty face, which only looks _mildly_ constipated, and I sigh melodramatically. "I _suppose_ I could get it _for_ you. You know, since you're doing such a good job with that walk." He beams, standing up a little straighter just as he was taught, and I catch myself legitimately smiling. Fine, fine, whatever, maybe I have a _bit_ of a soft spot for Ryan. Does it matter? I won't let myself get too attached - after all, he's only a Blank. No matter how many silly "Before" things I teach him, he will never be anything _but_ a Blank. My smile threatens to flip, and I strengthen it with a good dose of total fakeness.

"But why don't you have enough?" I ask, trying to turn my thoughts in a different direction.

"My mother read a Before book where a kid only got his allowance if he worked for it, so she wants to do that with me now." Ah, so that's where the gigantic allowance went. Still...

"So..?"

.

"I have nothing to do. She stays at home all day and cleans everything that could possibly be cleaned. What am I supposed to do?"

"Recommend another Before book, one where the kid gets a ridiculously huge allowance for no apparent reason," I suggest. His eyes widen.

"Woah, that's genius! Thanks, Tyler. Want to stop by the library with me on the way home?"

No, I can't. It's too much, and I can't handle seeing you pretend for much longer today. I hate pretending.

"Ah, sorry, can't. Homework and all that."

He frowns. "You never do your homework."

"Well, I at least _try_ to do it," I huff. "I'll go in early tomorrow morning and ask a teacher for help."

"I could help you! I got most of it done at school."

"How!?"

"I'm just clever like that," Ryan boasts, putting his nose in the air, and I smile softly. He's trying to make me laugh.

"Hmm. Tempting, but still no. Sorry, Ryan." I grab a bunch of coconut chocolate bars and dump them on the counter. While Ryan nearly faints (or at least pretends to) at the sight of all this chocolate, I scan my Feeling card and then shove all the candy into Ryan's backpack. "Have fun with that, buddy."

"Yesss," he drools, and I roll my eyes and try not to smile as I exit the store.


	5. 4: Off to a Great Start

_*tries to write longer chapter*_

 _*writes shorter chapter*_

 _CRAP_

 **Feel**

 **Chapter Four: Off to a Great Start**

 **Approximate Reading Time: 5 min, 45 seconds**

"I _told_ you your bird impersonations were crap!"

"Cuh-caw! Cuh-caw!"

"Oh, oh my _Notch_ , _why_ do I put up with you?"

"Cuh- _caw!"_

"Give it _up,_ Sky!"

"IF YOU WOULD JUST CUH-CAW LIKE THE REST OF THE WORLD, WE WOULDN'T HAVE THIS PROBLEM."

"Rest of the- _what_ rest of the world!? Sky, you're faking _bird noises_ in the new guy's back _yard._ We didn't even need a signal or anything, what the crap!?"

"Come on, do it with me. Accept it, Ty. You _know_ you want to."

"But-"

"CUH-CAW!"

"Notch. I don't-" He sighs. "Cuh-caw."

"With _fervor,_ Ty!"

"Oh, my Notch. Cuh- _caw._ "

"You know what? We'll work on it."

"Oh my Notch."

They're outside my house. Why are they outside my house? It's too early for this, oh dear. What are they even _doing_? They sound like freaking lunatics! What Before movies are _they_ watching?

"Dang it, Ty, you blew our cover!"

"What- by being totally done with you? Sky!"

"Shh. He's taking too long."

"Jason told us to wait by the door!"

"Well, I'm a rebel, dang it!"

"You're the one that suggested that specific plan to him, he only agreed because you told him to!"

"Hmph. I, um, I changed my mind."

"Yes, you tend to do that quite often."

The doorbell rings, and I contemplate trying the old Home Alone trick on them.

"Oh, Tyler~" Sky sings at my door, and I roll my eyes.

"Idiot, we're supposed to _sneak up_ on him."

"Screw that, _I_ think we should just talk to him."

"That's not what you thought this morning," Ty groans.

"Yo, Tyler! Open the friggin' door!" Sky calls, and I hold my pillow over my head. "We just wanna talk, dude! Come on, we brought Nutella! Ha, get it? 'Cause you live in Hazelnut forest. I'm so funny."

How are they so _loud?_ With a huge sigh of defeat, I throw my pillow off the bed, open my bedroom door, and stomp downstairs. "What," I growl, opening the front door, "do you want?"

"Tyler, hi! I'm Sky and that's Ty, remember us?" Brunette Number One asks. I sigh again and nod. "Cool, that's great! Ty kinda jacked up and almost died a few days ago, that's why we didn't follow you home. Sorry."

"Perfectly fine," I grumble. I can't believe I haven't slammed the door yet.

"Oh my gosh, your voice is so cute!" Sky squeaks, and Ty exhales slowly, mouthing his numbers up to ten. "You-"

"Okay, shove off, Sky," Ty butts in, getting my attention. "Look, Tyler, I'm sorry about the dumb circumstances under which we met. But if we could come in and talk to you, that would be great..?" He smiles slightly and fiddles with the purple bracelet on his wrist.

Notch.

"I cannot _believe_ I'm doing this," I breathe as I open the door farther. "Come on in, guys."

"Thanks so much, Tyler," Ty says as he pulls Sky inside. "Can we sit down?"

"I guess so." Ty gently pushes Sky toward the couch, and I sit down next to them cautiously. "All right, why are you guys here?"

"Well... You're an Emotive."

"I am aware."

"We are also Emotives."

"Oh. I- Oh." My throat feels dry. "What?"

"We can Feel just like you can, Tyler, and we've got other friends who can do the same."

"I- No, stop, this isn't funny. This won't give you, either of you, a purpose in life. This won't help." I stand up sharply. "Go away."

"Woah, Tyler, calm down. We're not lying, all right? We're Emotives."

"Ha, no, you aren't. I _know_ that trick."

* * *

 _"Hey, Tyler, wanna have a movie marathon after school?" he asked, glancing up at me with excited eyes. "We can try to solve the mystery before Sherlock."_

 _I laughed. "As if. John hardly ever figures it out,_ we _certainly won't."_

 _"Way to be a pessimist," he jokes._

 _"I do try," I respond, giggling with him. "Hold on, I'm gonna run back to the house to get a copy of the Sherlock Holmes book for us."_

 _Mistakes, mistakes. And, oh, regrets._

 _"Hey, I got_ The Hou _\- Crap."_

 _The Blanks are surrounding him. Is he okay? Are they hurting him? I wasn't gone for that long!_

 _"Shove off, let me through," I growl, pushing past a few Blanks. "Let me through, I need to see-"_

 _"Ay, it's the freakling!" he shouts, and his eyes are dead, emotionless. He looks like a Blank._

 _And not like my Feeling friend._

 _"Wha- What? I- K-" I stammer, tearing up. He can't be a Blank, he_ can't. _He can't have been faking it all this time, he_ can't _have. I can't be in love with a Blank, I_ can't _be. Please, anything but this-_

 _"Hey, Tyler, why is your face wet?" he asks. Mouth innocent, eyes cruel. "Are you crying?"_

 _"P-Please, I-" I close my eyes and suck in a shuddering breath. "Please don't-"_

 _"Tyler," he coos, and it's so fake, it's so fake it_ hurts _, as he brushes some of my hair out of my eyes. "Tyler, did you think it was real?"_

 _"Yes," I whisper, "I did."_

* * *

"Tyler, Tyler, hey," a soothing voice says softly. "Hey, it's okay, you're okay."

I choke out a broken "S-Sorry."

"No, no, you're fine, Tyler," Ty assures me. His face is blurry. Why is his face blurry? "It's all right, Tyler, here. You dropped these when you fell."

"I- I fell?" I ask, wiping my eyes and taking my glasses.

"Yeah, you started silently crying and you tried backing away from us but you tripped backwards over the coffee table and hit the wall and then slid down it and started sobbing. We're off to a great start!" Sky huffs sarcastically, and I snort out a laugh.

Ty smiles at me. "Better?"

I nod. "A little bit. Sorry again," I say after clearing my throat.

"Not a problem, Tyler. Who, um... who hurt you?" Ty asks gently, exchanging a look with Sky, who only frowns and shrugs.

"I- I'd rather not say," I reply carefully.

"Hmm. Well, look, we don't want to set you off again, but... would you like to come meet the rest of our team?"

"Uh, would you mind if... Could you two come over again tomorrow?" I ask quietly.

"Of course! Yes, of course, we can do that. Right, Sky?" Ty turns to face his friend, and Sky thinks for a moment before nodding.

"Yeah, we should be able to do that." His eyes light up. "Ooh, we can _cuh-caw_ to let you know when we've arrived!"

"That's a brilliant idea," I giggle as Ty opens his mouth, undoubtedly to protest. He sighs and rolls his eyes, but a smile twitches at his lips.

"Tomorrow," says Ty. "We'll be here."

The moment they leave, I start preparing. Diamond sword? Yes, please. I will not be caught off guard. Might as well pack some food, too - preferably enchanted food, but I don't have any at the moment. I'll pick some up tomorrow.

Next I shove a few Before books into my backpack, because now if I'm kidnapped, at least I'll have good reading material. You know, a comic book or two wouldn't hurt either... Maybe a manga, as well.

And now it's time to call Ryan.


	6. 5: FLESTER HAT

_IM SORRY IM SORRY IM TIRED IM SORRY_

 _ALSO MY FRIEND GAVE ME THE OPENING LINES_

 _I SWEAR THOSE TWO WORDS MAKE UP THE MAJORITY OF HER VOCABULARY XD_

 **Feel**

 **Ch 5: FLESTER HAT. END OF STORY.**

 **Approximate Reading Time: 4 min, 27 sec**

"Where are we going?"

"Your mom."

"What?"

"Nothing. We're going to the general store."

"Why?"

"We're going on a trip, Ryan."

"Oh, right! What do we need for the trip?"

"Notch apples, a sword for you, and whatever else you want."

"Woah, a sword? Like, like the kind we used to fight _wars_ with!? Hmm. Do they still sell those?"

"Yes, Ryan."

"Are you sure you're all right enough to go on a trip, Tyler?"

"Yes, I'm very all right, Ryan."

"I'm sorry my friends tried to hurt you," he pouts, and I swallow hard and look down. "They wouldn't listen. But you never actually got hurt, so why were you crying?"

"I..." I'm not good at handling that many people crowding around me. I can't bear it when the memories inevitably come flying back. I know they didn't hurt me but I'm hurting all the same. "I don't know, Ryan, I just do that sometimes. Maybe something got in my eye. Look, we're here!"

He forcibly lights up as we approach the store, and I barely manage a smile. "Hey, Tyler, is walking into a general store different from walking into a chocolate store?"

"Not really. I suppose you wouldn't be as happy," I say, and his smile droops. "No, no, but today it's okay because we're getting ready to go on a trip." His smile widens again.

"Where's the fruit section? Can I pick my own sword? Can I get a silly hat?" he asks, bouncing up and down as we enter the store.

"I- what? Sure, whatever. Meet me back here in half an hour." He darts off down the aisle, and I sigh. Oh, dear.

* * *

"Look what I got, Tyler!" he shouts about thirty minutes later, and I smile when he shows me his multi-colored, light-up flester hat. "Do you like it?"

"I love it, Ryan. Ready for checkout?"

"Yes, yes!" The boy jumps up and down a few more times and then shoves five random items into our cart. Well. All right, then.

After an interesting check-out session that involved Ryan yelling at the self check-out machine just like I taught him to, we're on the road back to Hazelnut Forest. "Are we really going to your house, Tyler?"

"Indeed, friend."

"Oh my gosh, oh my Notch, oh my gosh, I thought you were kidding! I've never been to your house, you never let me over!" He squeals, faking his excitement surprisingly well.

"For obvious reasons," I mutter, but he doesn't catch it. Good. I didn't mean it. "We're actually meeting two of my other friends there. They're going on the trip with us - actually, we're going with them."

"I'm not the first friend of yours to visit your house?" he asks, putting on his second pouty face of the day. Sigh.

"Well, the others came uninvited. You're the first one I'm _inviting,_ " I say, and the obvious emphasis I put on the word convinces him that he's still my best friend, which is enough to make him start jumping around again.

"Yay, awesome! This is gonna be so much fun, I can't wait!"

"You bet."

Okay, so maybe I'm not as excited as I should be? But I'm worried. And I keep telling myself that I'm only bringing Ryan along for physical protection, but, if I'm being honest, I need him emotionally as well. Despite his inability to actually _Feel,_ he at least _understands_ my feelings. And I'm so afraid that something will come up on our "trip" and I'll just freak out and collapse again, and... I need Ryan there.

So Sky and Ty are gonna have to deal with it.

"It's creepy," Ryan comments, voice filled with awe as I lead him through my amazing forest. We have to stop at every tree with a name carved into it, meaning we stop every few seconds. When I was younger, I would come out here and carve the names of my Before OTPs into tree trunks.

"It is," I agree, because hardly any light gets through the leaves, and the river is glistening in a scary way, and I just tripped over something that moves. Yay. Ryan catches me before I can fall, I shoot him the required smile before taking the lead again. "Here we go, right into this opening. See, follow the path - there, it leads right to my front door. Pretty neat, huh?" The clearing in which my house was built is beautiful, to be honest. The sun makes this little patch of the forest glow, and the clearing itself is almost a perfect circle. The grass is all a very, very healthy green despite my refusal to water it or care for it in any way, and there's a very small pond to the left of the house.

No Nutella trees.

Shame.

"Welcome," I say dramatically as I fling open the door and motion for him to step inside. His jaw drops as he enters, and I silently praise his acting. He's a lot better than the other Blanks.

"You live here? Woah, you live here! And you eat here and you sleep here and you _Feel_ here, cool!" he babbles, nearly tripping over the coffee table. Hmm, I really should move that.

"Yessir," I reply, setting down my backpack and our few shopping bags and placing some of the crap into my backpack. "Here, take your sword and put it somewhere convenient."

"Are we actually going to need it?"

"Quite possibly."


	7. 6: Trust

**Feel**

 **Ch 6: Trust**

 **Approximate Reading Time: 9 Minutes**

"Who is this?"

I snake my arm around Ryan's waist, pulling him closer to me and turning my nose up at Sky and Ty. " _Ryan_ is my _friend,"_ I inform them, "and I intend on bringing him with me to meet _your_ friends."

"That's- We don't even know him, we can't-"

"Oh, yes. I can trust two strangers enough to introduce me to a couple more strangers who may or may not be murderers or kidnappers, but you can't _possibly_ make it through a single introduction to someone I trust."

"You trust me?" Ryan asks, eyes wide and innocent as he looks up at me.

I huff and refuse to make eye contact. "Shut up, Ryan." He squeals, and I decide to ignore him.

"Is this a recent development, uh, Ryan?" Sky asks mischievously, and I cringe.

"Yes, it certainly is," the poor Blank replies excitedly.

"Oh, well. Congratulations! What did _you_ do to make him trust you?" Sky asks, surprising me quite a bit. I'd expected him to make some remark about how my point was invalid.

"I don't know, but I've been trying for years! He hasn't even let me over to his house before now!" Oh, wow, Ryan, ease off on the exclamation points. "He teaches me how to act Feeling, though, and maybe that has something to do with it."

"How to act-" Sky's eyes widen, and he freezes. Ty glances between Sky and Ryan quickly and then pushes Sky down onto the couch before he can pass out or something.

"You're a Blank?" Ty asks, voice sounding urgent and slightly panicked. He's trying to stay calm, though, that's fairly obvious by the way he pinches his thigh and bites his lip. Oh, wait. Did I goof? "You're a Blank," Ty breathes as Ryan nods eagerly. "Oh, Notch, no."

I done goofed.

"What's the problem?" I ask semi-nervously, holding Ryan closer still.

"He's- Tyler, _no_ , you can't just introduce us to _Blanks!_ We- Oh, Notch," Ty repeats, falling onto the couch next to Sky, who looks slightly dazed.

"We have failed epicly," Sky sighs. He swallows and stands up. "Look, it's fine. How much have you told him about us, Tyler?"

"I- Nothing much, just-"

"He bought me a sword, to fight any enemies on our adventure!"

I puff up my cheeks with air and then sigh. "Feeling people don't tell secrets to random people, Ryan."

"Apparently they do," Ty responds without a beat. I wilt a little under his accusing glare.

"Adventure? _Enemies?"_ Sky asks curiously, seeming a much more inviting conversation partner.

"Well, I mean, you guys showed up on my land out of nowhere, how was I supposed to know you weren't psycho murderers? And, like, you were taking me to an unknown location, of course I'm going to bring a friend and a weapon or two! Only for self-defense, of course," I ramble as Ryan slips away from me to explore my house. Blank attention spans, I swear.

"So you brought along a _Blank_ as your bodyguard," Ty says in a monotone, completely unamused.

"Not a bodyguard, a friend!"

"He's a Blank, Tyler."

"I'm a _ware_ ," I hiss. "I haven't exactly had many opportunities to make Feeling friends around here."

"You _had_ the opportunity to make several-"

"And he still has it," Sky interrupts, a warning tone in his voice. "Listen, Tyler, I know our appearance has been kind of sudden and unexpected, and we understand how that could throw you off. But we're... we're not supposed to be here, okay? We're with the Befo-"

 _"Sky!"_ Ty hisses, pulling him back down to sit next to him. "He clearly hasn't proven himself trustworthy, we can't just spout off classified information to him!"

" _We_ haven't come across as very trustworthy, either, what with all our secretive behavior. Stand up and be polite, Ty."

"But he-"

"Do you really trust Ryan?" Sky asks, turning to face me.

"Yes."

"Then I'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt, and-" Sky turns to glare at Ty again. "-And Ty is, too." Sky's expression switches abruptly to one of happiness and eagerness, effectively startling the crap out of me. "Are we ready to go? Ryan, get in here!"

Ryan bounds into the room, fighting back a grin that seems to appear by habit at this point. "Tyler! Why haven't you let me over before, this is amazing!"

"Sorry, I... I don't know, really. My reasons kind of change daily. Sometimes I don't actually have a reason." I cut myself off before I can start hardcore rambling. "Uh, sorry, come on, Ryan."

"Ooh, we're going? _Where_ are we going?"

"No idea. Ready?"

"Of course!" Ryan runs past me and out the door, only coming back after a few seconds that must have been very confusing for him. "Uh, could you lead?"

"No, but these two can," I respond, waving my hand towards Sky and Ty. "Right?"

Ty sighs. "Right," he echoes, finally standing up like Sky told him to. "Okay, follow me. Shouldn't take us long, the walk's short."

Sky and Ty lead us out the door, one with a smile and one with a very definite frown. We walk through the creepy forest, only getting distracted a few times by the various "attractions." Phan? Yes, I carved it into the tree, Ryan. No, it's not important.

Yes, Ryan, someday I'll let you carve one, too.

No, Ryler is not an acceptable thing to carve. Why do I talk to you, again?

I'm sharply reminded when we walk up to the Blue Ridge High School, when a group of Blank teenagers spot me and open their mouths to yell out things that will inevitably make me doubt myself and my ability even more, when Ryan calls out a simple and yet loaded "Hello!" and they all immediately snap their mouths shut.

That's why I talk to Ryan. He sticks up for me, and I'm not even sure why, since he can't exactly "care" about me.

Ty walks casually, as though he's just another unfeeling student without a care in the world. He shows very little interest in the setting sun, though I catch Sky sneaking looks every once in a while out of the corner of his eyes. Granted, Ty slips a bit and lets both a blush and a clearly genuine smile peek through when Sky puts a hand on his arm to subtly point him toward the rosy sky. Ty glances at it, his smile widens, he forces it back and stomps lightly on Sky's foot.

"Whatever, I'll try to be a better ninja," Sky huffs, marching ahead of us all to weave around the back of the school. "It's not like I haven't seen a sunset in ages or anything."

"You'll get to see the sunrise tomorrow, if it helps," Ty whispers in reply, running a few steps to catch up with him. I grab Ryan's wrist and tug him forward to keep up.

"It does a little bit," Sky laughs quietly. "Ooh, d'ya think Jason will watch it with me? Oh my Notch, Ty, it'd be so romantic!"

Ty's smile immediately turns fake – and trust me, I know a fake smile when I see one, you know, since I'm constantly seeing them. "I don't know, maybe."

oh

oH

It's like in one of my Before books, oh my Jeb, Ty's in love with Sky and Sky is in love with whoever this Jason dude is and-

Oh my Notch, it's a love triangle!

I've read about these my whole life, but I've never actually seen one in action! This is amazing!

Mm, but there is a very pressing question held before us: What is their ship name?

I suppose I'll have to figure that out later. Ty waves for me and Ryan to hurry up, and then he puts a finger in front of his mouth. Sky nods in agreement and shushes us loudly, and Ty's eyes widen in horror.

"Sky!" he hisses. "We have to actually be _quiet!"_

"Oh," Sky giggles, "I didn't realize."

Ty lets out a long, controlled breath of air and then motions for us to follow them to the large rock wall behind the school. It stretches twenty feet high and several hundred feet long, and it marks the city limits. I've no idea what's on the other side of it – it takes an immense effort to get around it, and I've been told there's really nothing special on the other side of it, anyways.

Sky keeps watch, glaring into the growing shadows around us while Ty digs around in his backpack. "Are those people gone?" Ty asks, referring to the group of Blanks that Ryan politenessed away.

"I can't hear them – I think they are," Sky whispers back. "Go ahead, I think it's dark enough." Ty pulls a small, rectangular gray gadget out of his backpack, and Sky gently takes a tiny green orb out of his own. "Ready when you are."

Ty waits a few moments, and I can't hear anything but our quiet, steady breathing and the sound of a few crickets nearby.

"Cover your ears," he says finally, and then he throws the rectangle at the rock wall.

As soon as it leaves Ty's hands, Sky launches the orb into the air, where it floats for a few seconds while emitting a very quiet and low-pitched sound. "Go!" Sky shouts, running towards the rock wall. Ty waves him through, and Ryan and I stare in awe as Sky disappears through a hole that was certainly not there before. The hole is growing, too, like something is eating the rock away slowly, quickly.

"You heard him; go!" Ty prompts us impatiently, and I pull Ryan over to the break in the rock without a second thought. "And _cover your freaking ears!"_

The orb's low-pitched, continuous scream is getting higher and higher and louder and louder, and, yeah, I can see why it would be preferable to have our ears covered at this point. I crawl out of the hole with Ryan right beside me, and we tumble out just so Ty can jump out after us. "Throw it, Sky!"

Sky tosses another small rectangular thing, this one gray with a red stripe, towards the area right above the hole in the rock wall, which is now growing at an alarming rate. The orb's now high-pitched tone picks up volume and even a sort of bravado, and I know Ty is saying something but I don't know what 'cause I can't hear him and I can't read his lips 'cause the hole in the rock _is closing back up_ , it's _growing more stone,_ how does that even work?

The rock wall closes up entirely, looking good as new, and the orb reaches a whole new frequency that I know I shouldn't even be able to hear. Then it slides down to a low wail before shutting off entirely, and a puff of smoke pops up from over the rock wall.

"Could've warned us before setting that thing off," a brunette boy grumbles, seemingly popping in out of thin air. "Care to explain?"

* * *

 _THIS IS MY "OOPS I HAVE UPDATED IN FOREVER" CHAPTER_

 _OOPS_

 _I HAVENT UPDATED IN FOREVER XD_


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